My first audiobook just released and I am a little amazed by it. Sean Letourneau is a voice actor who is talented and easy to work with. He worked hard to make the characters in Children of Ruin come to life, and I hope you’ll give it a listen.
If you don’t already have an Audible account, you can get a FREE copy of the audiobook. Just click here!
Ever wonder what authors would do in the case of a zombie apocalypse? On every Thursday, I’ll be posting the answers to that question on my blog…
This week, author Jane Alvey Harris weighs in on her zombie apocalypse survival plan.
My good friend James asked me to write up a guest post about what I would do in the event of a ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. I bet he wasn’t expecting to hear that I already have a ‘Zombie Contingency Plan’ ready to go. But I totally DO.
SML
Here’s the thing. I don’t like zombies. Like, AT ALL.
“Well, duh, Jane,” you might scoff. “Nobody likes zombies!” Yeah, yeah. So you say. But I know some of you secretly can’t wait to get out there and dust up some undead. I for REALS want NOTHING to do with them.
Anyone who knows me well knows what I would do in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I think it’s an important disclosure, and one that can tell you a lot about a person.
SLXL
XLLS
Mine do, and it’s pretty simple: I would off myself. Immediately.
MLXL
Trust me, I know this isn’t a popular plan, and you’re welcome to try and change my mind. But you won’t. I promise: I would only choose this plan IF there were an apocalypse, and IF that apocalypse produced brain-eating zombies.
IF, PEOPLE!!!
SLXL Because, (sorry, James) why would anyone want to survive a Zombie Apocalypse?? The living turn into MONSTERS, and like, strap strangers to mattresses for their snacking convenience, (I’m still traumatized after reading Cormac McCarty’s “The Road”) and all the undead are gory, gross, brain-eating machines.
I see no tenable future in that scenario.
Emily, the main character in my current series, the My Myth Trilogy, would XLL Shandle things quite differently. She’s a caricature of my own personality, which makes her simultaneously stronger and weaker than I am. Emily would survive to save her siblings Jacob, Aidan, and Claire (whereas I would kill us all). They’re her whole purpose, her reason for striving, her reason for facing her demons, her reason for doing really difficult things that almost paralyze her.
Emily may joke about zombies, but if they ever threatened her brothers and sister, she would decimate them with her masculine and feminine Fae powers of Blaze and Keen.
You absolutely want Emily on your side in a zombie apocalypse.
You just want to be very careful not to get to close…
and you definitely never want to piss her off.
As for me? I’m guessing you probably don’t want me on your side.
I have a Humanities degree from Brigham Young University with emphases in Art History, Italian Language, and Studio Art. I’m CRAZY about the visual and performing arts! I enjoy playing classical piano, painting & sketching, singing & acting, and especially writing poetry & prose.
But my real passion is PEOPLE. I love to watch and study what makes us tick as human beings. I’m definitely a dreamer, and my favorite thing to do is weave together sublime settings and stories for characters to live and learn in…myself included.
I currently live in an enchanted fairy-princess castle in Dallas, Texas, with my three often-adorable children and their three seldom-adorable cats.
Ever wonder what authors would do in the case of a zombie apocalypse? For the next several weeks, I’ll be posting the answers to that question on my blog…
This week, author Arthur Slade weighs in on his zombie apocalypse survival plan.
Headbanging. Now some people perhaps laugh at my joyful love of 80s heavy metal. Perhaps they even look down their collective noses at me. Well, they won’t be doing so during the zombie apocalypse.
I have well over thirty years of headbanging in my system. My neck muscles are like steel bands. My ability to shake my head at great speed (the true skill of headbanging) will come in handy when those hands and fingers of the rotting dead reach for me. Twist head to the left. Twist head to the right. Escape their grip! And if they corner me in a room with no escape I will just begin to shake and dance and play air guitar channelling Angus Young of AC/DC (look him up on YouTube you young ‘uns).
The zombies will all shake apart from the pure “metalness” of my performance. And finally, if an army of the dead approach, I will hit the high notes of Bruce Dickinson (Iron Maiden) and Rob Halford (Judas Priest) combined and the zombies will be incinerated.
Plus, I can run pretty fast for a middle-aged man.
Arthur Slade was raised on a ranch in the Cypress Hills of Saskatchewan. He is the author of eighteen novels for young readers including The Hunchback Assignments, which won the prestigious TD Canadian Children’s Literature Award and Dust, winner of the Governor General’s Award for Children’s Literature. He also co-created the graphic novel Modo: Ember’s End. He lives in Saskatoon, Canada.
P.S. He does all of his writing on a treadmill desk. And he listens to heavy metal. At the same time.
Ever wonder what authors would do in the case of a zombie apocalypse? For the next several weeks, I’ll be posting the answers to that question on my blog…
This week, author Jane Whittingham weighs in on her zombie apocalypse survival plan.
On first glance I might not appear to be the best person to have on your team in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I’ve never held a gun. I’m not particularly strong or fit. I have no outdoor survival skills. And I’m not exactly a dab hand with a baseball bat.
What I do offer, though, is a very special skill set gained by watching countless hours of cooking competition shows on television.
Stay with me here. In the aftermath of a zombie attack, food will likely be scarce and hard to come by. As the saying goes, though, an army marches on its stomach. How are we going to feed ourselves with no fast food outlets to rely on?
Friends, this is where my special skill set comes in. Thanks to all those episodes of Iron Chef and Chopped, I will be able to take the most random assortment of ingredients and turn them into something (somewhat) nutritious and (hopefully) delicious (or at least edible). I’ve seen chefs turn ground beef into delectable desserts, so I think I’m well prepared to handle even the most challenging culinary scenarios.
Now, this might not seem like the most vital skill in the face of global annihilation, but nutritious meals will help survivors keep up their strength (and avoid disastrous food poisoning), while tasty dishes will help build morale.
So hand me that tinned asparagus of questionable age, those bags of squished marshmallows, that bottle of cola and that squirrel you just trapped and let me work my magic!
Jane Whittingham is a children’s book author and librarian. Her debut picture book, Wild One, was published by Pajama Press in Canada in November 2017 and will release in the United States in March 2018.
In addition to books, she’s also passionate about travel and does share the occasional travel-themed post on Raincity Librarian. She also adores anime, Korean dramas, strong black tea, sushi, and her home city of Vancouver (aka RAINCITY).
What can I say, except please buy my books! If you’re a librarian, buy a copy for the library (they are also available on Overdrive!) and if you’re a reader buy a copy for yourself. Available in both eBook and paperback! (And please share this post!)
Click here to purchase from your favourite store!
In a society that has fallen to a nightmarish disease that brings the dead back to life, Ethan finds himself at war with his vengeful stepfather who taught him all he knows to survive in an apocalyptic world. Ethan gathers a troupe of other survivors – including Thomas, the thuggish football captain; Kady, the flighty cheerleader; and Gerald, the meek tinkerer – and builds a home base fortress to fight back against the army he knows his stepfather is creating. Ethan’s clan of survivors relies on him to guide them, but personal conflicts make it seemingly impossible to work as a team. Ethan knows, if they don’t pull themselves together, his stepfather will make them wish the disease had taken them first.
Click here to purchase from your favourite store!
Love, immortality, or vengeance? Which would you choose?
Rancor, a werewolf, has spent the last several hundred years training to kill vampires. Shay, a vampyre, has spent his time mocking the werewolf just for fun. Now, a thousand years after they first met, both werewolf and vampire will clash over the ultimate prize: true love. Filled with fast-paced action and a conclusion you won’t expect, Rancor will both win and break your heart.
Ever wonder what authors would do in the case of a zombie apocalypse? For the next several weeks, I’ll be posting the answers to that question on my blog…
This week, author Eileen Cook weighs in on her zombie apocalypse survival plan.
Eileen Cook is a multi-published author with her novels appearing in eight languages. Her books have been optioned for film and TV. She spent most of her teen years wishing she were someone else or somewhere else, which is great training for a writer. Her newest book, THE HANGING GIRL, came out in October 2017. She’s an instructor/mentor with the Simon Fraser University Writer’s Studio Program.
Eileen lives in Vancouver with her husband and two very naughty dogs and no longer wishes to be anyone or anywhere else.
Ever wonder what authors would do in the case of a zombie apocalypse? For the next several weeks, I’ll be posting the answers to that question on my blog…
This week, author Sylvia Gunnery weighs in on her zombie apocalypse survival plan. And she does so as a story! Sylvia is one of the authors I’ll be doing workshops with at the SD73 Young Authors’ Conference in Kamloops on May 4th.
It’s midnight (of course). The wicked winter wind howls around the corners of my house and the angry Atlantic Ocean pounds against the rugged shoreline. Salty spray is hurled at the trembling windows. All dire warnings. But is anybody listening?
Snow swirls out of the darkness like desperate, lost ghosts.
Or zombies.
A sudden knock sounds on the front door. Eerie. Eager. Then again.
Through the frosted window I think I see, in the dangerous darkness, a crowd (more of a small collection, than a crowd, actually) of desperate zombies, huddled helplessly together. They plead with undead eyes for me to let them come in out of the apocalyptic storm. The winter nor’easter, my first weapon, has grabbed the zombie spirits by their fleshy (er..I mean…) creepy throats. They are already faltering in their gruesome intentions!
But the zombies are not yet conquered. (Of course not.)
My second weapon is ready.
I open the door. Zachery (I already know his name because I’m the one writing this scene) stands at the head of this zombie collection. He’s the one who came up with the brainy (yummmmm) idea to appear at Crescent Beach on this winter-storm night. Zachery nods to his nearly dead followers. Like a group of ten-year-olds at Hallowe’en, they crowd into my porch. I close the door against the wild wind and frigid, foreboding night.
Grey eyes stare out of decayed faces. Grey and blistered lips curl across pointed and purposeful teeth.
“Hu…” I stop myself (before it’s too late) from asking if anyone’s hungry.
“Thi…” I stop myself (before it’s too late) from asking if anyone’s thirsty.
My second weapon has begun to work its magic. Silent. Invisible. It oozes into their brittle zombie bones. Finally, their grey and gruesome zombie thoughts slowly begin to melt away in the warmth of the fire in the wood stove. (Note: slowly begin to melt away.) It’s not over yet!
I have one more weapon left! (Three is always a good number in story structure–you know, like three wishes, or three little pigs, or three blind mice. Or, in this scene, three zombie-conquering weapons.)
With my third weapon, I will turn this boney band of beleaguered bodies into a calm collection of curious creatures!
“Sit down, everyone. Make yourselves comfortable,” I say. “Do I have a story for you!”
It was a dark and stormy night…
About the author…
Sylvia Gunnery first took herself seriously as a writer when she attended the five-week Banff Centre writing session in 1976 under the instruction of W.O. Mitchell, Alice Munro, and others. Since then she has published over 25 books for teens and children as well as professional resources for teachers of writing. A recipient of a Prime Minister’s Teaching Award, she has presented at conferences, libraries, and schools across Canada. In 2016, she was honoured with a WFNS Legacy Membership. Sylvia lives at Crescent Beach, on the South Shore of Nova Scotia. Her newest YA novel is Road Signs That Say West (Pajama Press 2017).
